My Spiel

standing for election

2007-01-30T02:16:03Z

Took me long enough

"Jared Evans – Manifesto for NUS Conference

I am a 4th year computer science student at DMU. While I have openly criticised the Union I have not had much to do with it, but I fell that now is the time to start changing the way that the NUS is run and the policies that it makes.

There are many policies that I feel apply greatly to DMU students and will be voting for so that our futures can keep going. As a fourth year student undertaking a postgraduate course is of great importance to me. This year at the conference the discussion of postgraduate fees is on the table and I will be voting for the NUS to take an in-depth look at the standardization of these fees. With the introduction of top up fees we do not need another confusing approach to paying for our further education.

Of course along with the look into postgraduate fees I still have to think about the students who will be following me. With that in mind I will be fully supporting the NUS campaign for free education. We can not let the future of the UK suffer by creating an educational class system.

I feel another problem that students have these days is the amount of debt that is racking up. The tragic death of a University of Swansea student because of hounding by High Street banks due to debt leads me to support Swansea's motion calling for the NUS and high street banks to work together to contain student debts.

As a friend and boyfriend of an international student, I can't deny my passions lie with our friends from overseas. I will be voting for caps on your fees and for more resources to be made available to you.

As a Welsh national, I now benefit from all my prescriptions that are made in Wales being free, however I was born in England and my roots still lie there. As a student we do not need more costs than are needed and I will be joining the LSE and Heriot –Watt University call for free prescriptions in England.

I wish I could list all the policies that I wish to vote for but these are some that are close to my heart.

Jared Evans"

month of celebrity deaths

2006-12-30T11:44:59Z

Well It's been a wonderful christmas for me and my family and my g/f and we wish you all a very merry one and a happy new year.

However some celebrities have been less fortunate, James Brown who wasn't feeling fine anymore, gerald ford who.. isn't president anymore and now saddam hussein who was hanged yesterday or today, whichever.

I don't know how true to life southpark is, but if it contains any fact at all, saddam will be fucking the devil right now plotting how to regain control of the earth, i find this slightly more disturbing than him being alive.

I do feel sorry for him though, Saddam really is one of the last great dictators. Who else do generations of children hellbent on taking over countries and ruling them with an iron fist and a cigar have to look upto?

Longlive Saddam!

religious idiots

2006-12-07T21:37:03Z

You know me, i'm one of these people with logic and reasoning.

Anyhow i noticed this news story the other day. http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/uk_politics/6208642.stm, once i read it i knew it needed an update.

WTF is this guy on, getting rid of tridents is not a good idea.

picture the scene if my bishop gets his way....

we've just got rid of tridents because the church said it's anti god or some shit, iran launches a nuke at us, the UK is about to get obliterated because we have no nukes to threaten them with either. Rowan Williams is running around looking for a nuclear shelter. he knocks on the door, it opens a crack they see it's him and they say "fuck off god boy. god will save you from the nukes".

hahahahha i want it to happen now. Since when did becoming a minister of the church mean you could spout shit about defence programs.

oh well nevermind.

Open Letter to The Pope

2006-10-17T00:02:15Z

I know i haven't updated ina long while, and i shall get round to it, but i thought i would add this to my "open letter" series.

"October 17, 2006

Your Holiness,

My name is Jared Evans and I am a 4th year Computer Science student currently studying at De Montfort University. As you can imagine, being a computer science student I am fascinated by technology, not only that though, I am fascinated by the human body and modern technological advances in studying the human body.

The other week I was reading the news about a woman in a vegetative state who appears to be conscious in brain scans, I refer you to this article http://www.abc.net.au/science/news/stories/2006/1735888.htm?health, but I believe the original is in nature http://www.nature.com/news/2006/060904/full/060904-11.html.

My main question for you, your Holiness, would you be willing to have a brain scan (PET, CAT) while in prayer so that scientists can study what is happening when you communicate with god. While you may argue that this scan could be of anyone of any faith, you would have to admit as the figure head of the catholic faith, you are an ideal candidate for such a study. While my question is really rhetorical I would be intrigued to know your answer.

Sincerely,
Jared Evans"

I am in two minds whether to add a "P.S. can you please sign the enclosed gideons bible"

This shall be in the post (though it may have to be 2nd class) pretty soon.

RIP Steve Irwin

2006-09-04T05:30:17Z

My Gosh, I bring you the sad news that Steve Irwin has died http://www.news.com.au/dailytelegraph/story/0,2204... this is a tragic day for the majority of mankind.

never will we see this fearless man performing entertaining yet factual documentaries about all manner of beasts, we will have to deal with sub par copy cats.

my heart goes out to the Irwin family.

random

2006-08-25T13:04:41Z

i need a new life, so while ebaying around i found this

http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&rd=1&item=150023276458

seems like a great opurtunity to me, ive always wanted a published book in my name.

anyway in other news i'm glad aston villa have been taken over now. i'm really looking forward to them kicking some ass this season.

Failure

2006-08-25T01:55:50Z

So I failed my driving theory test the other day, test and failing seem to go hand in hand with me.

anyway as you may know, I tend to get pissed off when things don't go right and I end up blaming the world and not me. well this is no different so lets begin

<rant>

fucking driving theory tests what do they even prove that you can remember what the sign of a cattle grid is? I mean they give you 35 random questions and if you don't get 30 right it means you're an unfit driver? how did they work that one out, now I completely understand the point in a practical driving test, a instructor can see that you can actually drive and vaguely follow the formalities of the road. I'm led to believe that the driving test takes an hour, well fuck if that's not long enough make it 2 hours surely it's better to have it longer than shorter and hope that some spotty teenager who has memorized the fricking book by hand and will throw out all the information as soon as they pass.

ok fine so you get 6 questions wrong, now surely it'd be better as a percentage, I don't know I mean I got 29 questions right and I can drive relatively safely (despite nearly killing us today,going through a closed junction crossroads at 30mph isn't a great idea especially when you have to give way). 29 fucking questions makes me unfit to drive the road, I mean what does knowing one more question really say. is it really that much better than having 29? fuck that guy knows why putting stabilizers on a caravan is a good thing (I had 2 freaking questions on caravans) whereas that other guy doesn't, surely the first guy is the better driver? wrong!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

</rant>

oh well theres nothing i can do. I'll be back on the 7th sept to retake it and pass it this time..... i shall know everything. i will be a walking highway code.

onwards with life.

i'm frustrated

2006-08-25T00:24:07Z

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0457270/

i saw this film was on sky tonight so switched over to it, thinking it may be an intresting emmanuelle type film.... no it was a film about some kid who discovers porn and then his whole life gets destroyed because he spends too much time looking at porn.

it really pisses me off when they come out with this shit, like when karl kennedy became an alcaholic when he drank a bottle of wine a night. talking of which, i really can't stand to watch neighbours any more as it's so bad, but i digress.

basically the problem with this film is that everyone freaks out about it. the parents don't know what to do and act like idiots, instead of really talking to the kid saying "hey, it's ok to find naked women attractive" they tell him he has a problem and needs professional help. yes maybe from a hooker but not from a Doc.

if viewing porn wrecks your life, then you didn't really have a life to begin with.

now i'm gonna go check out some jenna jameson.

so long pluto

2006-08-24T13:56:58Z

So it has been voted that pluto is no longer a planet http://msnbc.msn.com/id/14489259/

well i for one will be missing our very small very distant cosuin. i'm sure that it will affect our lives greatly. one day when we're older with kids, and grand kids, we can tell them. i remember a time when there used to be 9 planets in our (original?) solar system. wow...

anyway i'm chilling to the doors right now, cool mannnnnn coooooool

and it's back

2006-08-21T19:41:39Z

we still don't know why Amazon died but i can tell you now that is back.

weird.

Amazon is Down - attacked by terrorists?

2006-08-21T19:20:51Z

www.amazon.com is down for some reason that no one knows the answer to why. One of the worlds biggest shopping sites has gone offline, this is rather weird.

amazon.co.uk is also down. again no one knows why, i presume only amazon themselves know what is going on. i'd hazzard a guess that theya re relaunching their site? could this though be a attack by terrorists? is this iran building up for an attack. we're not going to find out for a little while yet. more news as it comes to us?

awesome concept for a film

2006-08-17T19:21:46Z

right well the world has already established that "snakes on a plane" is quite possibly the best concept for a film. however this one goes back 4 years and i can't believe the world missed it. i bring you:

Bubba Ho-tep

6 days to go, to SoaP up

2006-08-12T12:45:39Z

right. We all know that "Snakes on a Plane" is coming out and will be the best thing ever (well maybe boris johnson becoming leader of the country might be better but..), however would it be even slightly better if Mr T was playing Samuel L?

models going to pot

2006-08-07T16:36:41Z

no i'm not talking about kate moss.

however my g/f is one of these people who loves "[country name] next top model". now we were watching britains next top model the other day, and ive seen a few of these programs, from australia to america. now it struck me while watching this program how ugly the girls are for Britain's next top model. now i know i'm no hot dawg, but i'm not a model either or at least trying to be, you would of thought these girls would be quite hot, but they're so not. now watch america's or australias next top model and prepare for your tongue to fall out (unless you have a g/f then keep your mouth closed) with the heat of the women on here.

11 days to go

2006-08-07T16:05:50Z

I thought I best warn you all.

The greatest film in the world is only 11 days away from US release. what film am i on about? harry potter 5? the hobbit? indiana jones and jurassic park 4?

no no no, none of those shoddy films. It is of course SoaP.

Snakes on a Plane

word upto my people

2006-08-07T11:05:27Z

I need a job, i'm pretty much broke, i suck.

However i've failed to update about my excitement in learning to drive. finally ive been put behind the wheel of a killing machine and with my ever important catchphrase fresh in my head "it's illegal to run people/you over", i have taken to the roads like a duck to water.

my instructor is a cool guy, he supports Man U though (go Giggsy). i'm really having fun and even though ive only had 2 lessons so far he believes i should be going down the dual carridgeway soon. already ive been doing slighty over 30 in built up areas, woopsie. first lesson i stalled like 4 times or more, second lesson i stalled once. result!

anyway only 17 more lessons left.

superb

whats going on in my life right now

2006-07-30T01:38:45Z

jaredce @ 2006-07-30T02:29:00

2006-07-30T01:29:59Z

blame the nazi's

2006-07-27T10:25:41Z

i blame the nazi's for the mess in the middle east that we have now. if they had been more efficient....

ahhh cardiff

2006-07-26T12:25:16Z

I love being back in cardiff.

It's been a summer of hanging out with mates and reminiscing, some of them have now graduated and while hanging around not really wanting to step out into the big wide world and claiming dole, you never know when they're going to go.

Last night a large group of us went down to a beach in bridgend (westend beach i think though i don't know), well i say beach but it was more of a rockery. it was an awesome night we tooka hell of alot of burnable material and made a fire and just sat out there drinking beers and chatting around the fire. there were some guys walking around and they stopped when they saw us and our fire and kinda hung around kinda making a point of wanting to be invited over, so we did. they musta been about 17 and they were emo's. of course they were making fun of emo's while most of us kinda sniggered to ourselves pointing out that they were emo's themselves, or at least looked it.

i love cardiff though, i love being back home, i love chilling out. i'm gonna miss this life when i graduate, when my friends move away to discover what life has in store, when everything moves on.

i hate dakota

2006-07-24T20:32:29Z

MR Morrish sent me a txt the other day, something along the lines of wishing to dakota fanning in an advert for ann summmers (perhaps i misread it). but it lead me to remember to update about this.

what do you when your most hated actress (dakota fanning) appears in the same show as one of your most favourite actors (Glenn Morshower).

I picked up CSI season 1 while out in Malaysia and so have been watching the first season over the last few days. anyhow both these actors appeared in one episode, dakota appeared first and so i instinctly said "worst episode... ever", then Glenn appeared so i was like "best episode ever". however glenn was in it for 1 line and dakota was in it for too long, unfortunately she wasn't a corpse, she was a incestually abused child... which i suppose... no it's not as good as being a corpse.

dakota only has one look which is normally upset. i hate her, luckily she only said one thing, though normally she ends up screaming, so i was kinda happy i just had to put up with her fuglyness.

death to dakota.

another piece of (fake) documentation to add to my (fake) name

2006-07-21T14:03:36Z

So today i received my provisional driving license (yes 3 years too late, bloody royal mail). As per all my other bits of documentation bar my birth certificate and anything from the doctors it uses the Jared part as my real name instead of Christoper being mentioned at all. so yeah i'm kinda happy as it means i can now start learning to drive. watch out world, here i come.

ever feel out of depth

2006-07-20T16:24:33Z

So as everyone who reads this may or may not know, i goto DMU, that's De Montfort University.

My g/f is currently fiddling around trying to get an arty type portfolio ready to try and get accepted into Cardiff University School Of Architecture (Number 1 or Number 2 in the country for architecture depending on what newspaper guide you read). It's at times like this you kinda realise how, hmmm how can i put it, dumb you feel. Now i know that DMU is good for something, i'm pretty sure ive heard debbie say that the midwifery course here is one of the best in the countries. so of course DMU isn't the worst but it certainly ain't the best (i got there). but my g/f has an A in A-level maths, an A in A-level Physics and an A in A-level chemistry. English isn't even her first language. I didn't have a single A in my GCSE's.

it's when you hear things like that, you start thinking to yourself, god i'm dumb, or at least i do. i'm surrounded by very clever people.

i don't know where i'm trying to go with this. i started out with a thought but have sorta lost trail with it. i do that often, maybe thats why i'm at DMU and not Oxford. meh.

they think it's all over, it is now (interval)

2006-07-04T15:35:38Z

Happy 4th of July if there are any Americans reading this. Probably not.

my 4th of July (though i'm not American) was spent taking a well rested break. Not having to goto work. Yes my working life at DMU Kimberling Library is now over. If either of my ex bosses are reading this, then well i can only reiterate again that i'm very thankful for the year you gave and i enjoyed and learnt a hell of alot. So thank you for everything and i hope that everything goes well in your lives.

So like England i shall be heading home, though i guess England have already gone (surely they can get tickets to the rest of the games, it'll still be enjoyable) whereas i'll be going on Saturday the 8th July. Back home to cardiff. I suppose i should get myself a job while there. ell i need to packup my gear while here. Today i bought my scweet ass amp, which is gonna roxxa my boxxas, if you must know what it is it's a Marantz PM4001 http://www.salisburyhifi.co.uk/website/marantz/pm4001.htm. anyway thats gonna be rocking my room for this summer.

So on saturday me and my g/f watched the England Game, we were gonna goto the PB but it was so hot that we just gave up and went home (we had previously been in town looking around but by about 2pm we were sweating buckets (which is kinda hard and hurts) and decided home would be a good place to go. luckily in this weather i can do loads of washing and hang it on the line.

Yesterday the new placement student came in and took over from me.my boss says he's added me to bugzilla which is a bug tracking interface and very geeky, but i'm not expecting anything from it (i say with a cocky mouth?). anyway the new guy is nice and will easily fit in i imagine.

tonight i shall be watching Germany V Italy down at the PB. i'd like to place a fiver on Germany but to be honest i doubt i'd win since ive got no frigging clue whats gonna happen in this game.

lots else has happened, but i'm lazy.

5 star KL part 1

2006-05-26T16:07:47Z

it's been a big break. i'm still in malaysia, ive had a tummy upset where my bera has been a bit wet. so lets start from sunday morning. keeping Travel log and not updating everyday tends to lead to large updates.

Sunday morning, wake up early, my stomach is playing around as i lie in bed trying to get my barings. I get up, shower, dress mull around a bit, then promptly goto the toilet where i let some huge ones out.

we packed the night before, well semi packed. so after the toilet we're running a bit late because i took some time as i really wasn't doing a bera like normal. i realise i'm not ready and we really need to leave so i kinda grab whatever i can find and run for the door. my g/fs mum (yes i know how you feel morgan it's just that my g/f doesn't like me using her name so err yeah i know.) is taking us and my g/f's mum is a bit of a speed demon enjoying the fast lane, she says if she has to go slow she falls asleep (hmm good to know, i feel so safe).

so penang airport is on the island and is about 45mins away, my g/f's mum is speeding down the highway whizzing in and out of cars and motorcycles. Malaysia (Penang at least) is littered with motorcycles/scooters. for every car on the road there is probably 10 motorcycles. we get to the airport probably in 30mins my stomach is still flipflopping as we drive and i'm staring quietly out the window hoping to god i don't poop my pants or something. we have 20minutes left to check in and run to the gate and board or we miss the flight. we hit the checkin counter for air asia, asias answer to easy jet. theres a long Q it would seem everyones trying to check in large items, and we're thinking shit, what if we miss the flight. however we get there we just have hand luggage and so we just present our coupon number and get our boarding cards.

now i don't think i told you this but airport security here is really really lax, basically we have a few handluggage items. in heathrow everything would have to be scanned from your wallet and pocket change to your liquor packed hand luggage. over here we put one thing on the belt and just get waved through, the metal detector beeped, my pockets full of stuff, sling bag on my shoulder, i get patted down and said "ok". if you want to hijack a plane this is the country to do it from. we're at the gate and in the Q now. soon we're on board ina nice exit aisle seat, i must say air asias seats are very nice, fully leather (or leather like), good bit of leg room (though i was in the exit aisle seat and it was a 40min flight).

As soon as we're in the air and the seatbelt sign is switched off, i'm back in the toilet, damn i'm missing that hose already. 30minutes later we land back in KLIA.
Ok well it would seem that KLIA is a huge airport and we're 40mins from the main terminal by a 3ringit bus ride (like 50p). my stomach still not well.

we reach the main terminal, head to check into the airport hotel but decide against it, now instead of taking the 9ringit bus to KL Sentral we take the 35ringit monorail thingy to KL Sentral (never let a woman be in charge of transport plans). it's a nice ride actually the toilet (i'm getting familiar with these things now) were nice and clean too. that took god knows how long, about 40minutes (is this feeling like an episode of 24 to you, steve i'm disapointed with you, here i am in the beautiful malaysia waiting to watch 24, DH, Lost and so on with you and it seems you're already ahead of me).

from KL Sentral it was off to another state, Selangor to goto sunway pyramid and sunway lagoon. Sunway pyramid is a pyramid shaped shopping mall with spynx's outside. sunway lagoon is a theme park with wet and dry rides. Anyway it was another 45minutes or so from KL Sentral to Selangor. from there a 10minute taxi ride to the pyramid. Once inside we located a pharmacy so i could take some pills, we then went and picked out cheap clothing like long sleeve shirts so we wouldn't burn in the sun. Diesel clothing is extremely cheap here. we then checked into the hotel for 290ringit for the night, it's a 5 star hotel and we had a wonderful room which had a kitchen and a great view and a great bathrom and other stuff, it was awesome.

once checked in we took a bag of stuff down to the lagoon and damn was it a great day, the first ride we went on my g/f decided we should ignore the "you wil get wet" sign and go on anyway claiming it said "you might get wet". might,will whats the difference we did get wet and so we decided to change into our cheap wet ride clothing.

it was a long day and we were pooped by the end, we just wanted to eat and goto bed.